How To Ask Someone To Write A Letter Of Recommendation: A Comprehensive Guide
Asking for a letter of recommendation can feel like navigating a tricky social situation. You want to make a great impression, ensure you get a glowing letter, and avoid putting undue pressure on the person you’re asking. This guide provides you with everything you need to know to successfully request a letter of recommendation, from the initial approach to the final thank you.
Understanding the Importance of a Strong Letter of Recommendation
Letters of recommendation are powerful tools. They can sway admissions committees, potential employers, and scholarship boards. A well-written letter provides an independent, external perspective on your skills, character, and achievements. It’s not just a formality; it’s an endorsement that can significantly boost your chances. Think of it as a personal testimonial that validates your application.
The Impact of a Good Recommendation on Your Opportunities
A positive recommendation can highlight aspects of your personality and abilities that might not be readily apparent in your resume or application. It can provide specific examples of your accomplishments, demonstrating your value in a concrete way. A strong letter can differentiate you from other candidates, especially in highly competitive situations. It can also help bridge any gaps in your application, such as explaining a period of unemployment or highlighting a particular skill set.
Identifying the Right Person to Ask for a Letter
Choosing the right person is crucial. The best person to write your letter is someone who knows you well, can speak to your strengths, and has a positive impression of your abilities.
Considering Your Relationship with the Potential Recommender
Think about the depth of your relationship. Did you work closely with this person? Did they witness your skills firsthand? A professor who remembers your insightful contributions to class discussions or a supervisor who saw you consistently exceed expectations are ideal choices. The more specific the recommender can be, the more impactful the letter will be.
Evaluating Their Knowledge of Your Skills and Accomplishments
The recommender should be able to articulate your specific skills and accomplishments. A letter that simply states you are “a good student” is less effective than one that details your problem-solving abilities, your leadership qualities, or your ability to work collaboratively. Consider who has seen you demonstrate these abilities in a professional or academic setting.
The Art of the Initial Request: Timing and Approach
Once you’ve identified the right person, it’s time to make the request. How you ask is as important as who you ask.
When to Make Your Request: Give Them Ample Time
Give your recommender plenty of time. Ideally, you should request the letter at least four to six weeks before the deadline. This allows them ample time to write a thoughtful and detailed letter without feeling rushed. Avoid making last-minute requests, as this can put undue pressure on them and potentially result in a less effective letter.
How to Approach the Request: Email, In-Person, or Phone?
The best method depends on your relationship with the person. An email is generally acceptable, especially if you haven’t seen the person recently. However, for a particularly important letter, an in-person conversation or a phone call can be more personal and allow for a more natural dialogue. This demonstrates that you value their time and effort.
Crafting a Polite and Specific Request
Your request should be polite, clear, and specific. Start by reminding them of your connection and the context of your relationship. Briefly explain what you are applying for (e.g., graduate school, a specific job). Then, clearly state that you are requesting a letter of recommendation and why you believe their perspective would be valuable.
Providing Essential Information to Your Recommender
To make the process easier for your recommender and to ensure they can write a compelling letter, you need to provide them with relevant information.
Supplying Your Resume or Curriculum Vitae (CV)
Provide your recommender with a copy of your resume or CV. This will refresh their memory of your accomplishments and provide a comprehensive overview of your experience and skills.
Sharing Your Application Materials and the Deadline
Include any application materials that will help them understand your goals and the context of your application. This might include your personal statement, a job description, or the application guidelines. Clearly state the deadline for the letter and how they should submit it (e.g., online portal, email).
Providing a List of Your Accomplishments and Key Skills
Help your recommender by providing a list of your key accomplishments and skills. This will give them specific examples to draw from when writing the letter. Highlight the skills and experiences that are most relevant to the position or program you are applying for.
Following Up and Expressing Gratitude
After making the request and providing the necessary information, it’s important to follow up and express your gratitude.
Checking In Respectfully: A Gentle Reminder
If the deadline is approaching and you haven’t heard back from your recommender, it’s acceptable to send a polite reminder. Don’t be overly demanding. A simple email like, “I just wanted to check in and see if you have any questions about the letter of recommendation. The deadline is approaching on [date],” is sufficient.
Showing Your Appreciation: A Handwritten Thank You Note
Once the letter has been submitted, send a thank-you note. A handwritten note is especially appreciated. Express your gratitude for their time, effort, and support. Let them know the outcome of your application if you are comfortable sharing it.
Addressing Potential Challenges: What If They Decline?
Sometimes, a potential recommender might decline to write a letter. It’s important to handle this situation gracefully.
Understanding the Reasons for Declining
They might be too busy, feel they don’t know you well enough, or believe they can’t write a sufficiently strong letter. Respect their decision.
Handling the Rejection with Grace and Finding Alternatives
Thank them for their time and understanding. Don’t push them to reconsider. Then, move on to your next choice and make the request in the same thoughtful and respectful manner.
Maximizing the Impact of Your Letter of Recommendation
While you can’t write the letter yourself, you can help ensure it’s as effective as possible.
Choosing the Right Recommenders
As discussed earlier, this is key. Select individuals who know your work and abilities.
Providing Specific Information
The more context you provide, the better.
Understanding the Importance of the Letter
Remember that a strong letter can be the deciding factor in your application.
Frequently Asked Questions
How do I know if someone will write a good letter for me?
Think about the quality of your interactions with them. Did they seem impressed with your work? Did they give you positive feedback? If they consistently praised your performance or demonstrated genuine interest in your success, they’re likely to write a strong letter.
Is it okay to ask someone I barely know?
It’s generally not advisable. A letter from someone who doesn’t know you well will lack the personal touch and specific examples that make a recommendation impactful. Focus on people who have a genuine understanding of your skills and accomplishments.
What if my recommender asks for my personal statement?
Absolutely provide it! Your personal statement provides context and helps them tailor the letter to your specific goals. It helps them understand your aspirations and write a more compelling recommendation.
Can I remind my recommender about a specific project or accomplishment?
Yes, it’s perfectly acceptable and even helpful! Providing specific examples and details can jog their memory and help them write a more detailed and impactful letter. Provide relevant information so that they can best speak to your strengths.
What if the application portal requires me to enter my recommender’s information before they’ve agreed to write the letter?
Always ask them first! Let them know that you’ll need their email address and any other required information. This allows them to prepare and ensures they’re comfortable with the process.
Conclusion: Securing Your Future with a Strong Recommendation
Asking for a letter of recommendation is a crucial step in many professional and academic pursuits. By understanding the importance of a strong letter, identifying the right person, making a respectful request, providing the necessary information, and expressing your gratitude, you can significantly increase your chances of receiving a glowing recommendation. Remember that a thoughtful approach, combined with clear communication, will set you apart and help you secure the opportunities you deserve.